Update

Well, we moved from the hood to paradise, basically. Chicago style paradise, which doesn't mean hotdogs or super deep dish pizza, but we moved north in Chicago. We have a large back deck, a small yard, free heat and laundry, and we are steps (like 50 steps) from a giant, awesome, green expansive park. My commute is longer. It means I am on the bus an hour each direction every day. BUT, everything else is far far far better.


E. climbs trees now too. And he's really good at it. He was made for it! He can climb anything, this kid.


Work is not so good right now and hasn't been for over a month. I'm not sure when (or if) it will get better. I feel as if I must need to reexamine my career...but this isn't the time to do that as I need to have a job and at least it pays pretty well.

I'm getting a lot of pressure from my family about E's behavior. He is an intense kid who likes to push boundaries. We don't always know what to do about it. My mother seems to think he's going to be a bully and that we are to blame. It's very hard having him around her when she constantly is on him for every little thing he does. We have rules in our house, but they are not the same as hers. I don't know what to do about it, and every time we have to see her I worry for days about what he might do and what she might say. It makes me a very stressed parent. This week, my brother is in town, so I am extra stressed because we will be around them a lot. It doesn't help that E is 3, and that he's still adjusting to the move (we moved may 1st). Of course my mother swears that moving isn't a big deal and doesn't get why he's having a hard time. We moved a lot as kids, and she thinks it was easy for us. In my case, I know I was too afraid of her to seem like it was anything but easy. Also, our first move was when I was 8.

"Every kid is different, he's a bit more sensitive", isn't enough for her. Of course, this is the same mother who came down on me for holding him too much when he was a baby. Can you hold a baby too much?

I'm very sad and frustrated. Being a mom of a kid going through 3 is hard enough. It really is. I wish I had some support from her...but I should know that's not something I would ever get.

Here are some great pics from the weekend. Sorry to be such a downer. I just feel alone right now, and so much like I need to wrap my family up and take them far far away from her.

e and his "best friend" and cousin.

putting his hat out for candy

Faster

e loves scooting! I took this action shot by snapping it before he was even on it.

this is my favorite picture of e right now. He's watching tv in this shot, the day before his 3rd birthday...but such an angelic look.

Ok....it's become obvious to me now that I suck and getting the blogs posted. Can I blame it on the job? Yes! Is it fair to say that having a 2 to 3 year old is a huge time suck? Yes. Would I change it if I could? Well, the job, yes...but not the kid. I mean who doesn't wish for a better job?

Well, little boots boy is probably happy with this job.

I work for a department at a University as an Assistant to the Head. It's a fancy sounding title, but I end up just feeling like e knob...like a pee-on, like a person who is helping someone else succeed in while at the same time not succeeding. I rarely write anymore....except for the job and that is not creative writing my friends, it is not at all. I rarely craft. I made E a doll for his birthday, but that's about it for the last year. I hardly even read blogs. I think it has everything to do with being too busy both at work and home. Obviously, blogging and reading blogs at work is a no no...though I might be doing it right now because it's spring break and no one is here, and at home, by the time E is asleep and I have cleaned the kitchen, I'm ready to watch one TV show and call it a night. That's it.

Night is a bit of a circus sometimes. It's hard for me to deal with in a rational way...I think because I'm so tired from working and then I have to just swing into high 3 year old gear and roll with the punches. And E is getting better at playing by himself, but he isn't the kind of kid you can turn your back on. He just might scale a bookshelf or find something he shouldn't have. He's gotten so tall that there is only one home surface he can't reach that I can reach. This has made said surface into a verifiable disaster area...as everything gets stuck up there that needs to get out of his reach. And if he has the idea to do it, he simply pulls a chair over and reaches the top and all the things on it easily. he knows he isn't supposed to do this, but sometimes, he does it anyway.

All of this is to say why I haven't blogged in a while. I just can't. By night's end I'm wordless...and wordless blogs are ok now and then, but it's not why I blog.

Now that I have that off my chest, I will let one other thing off and then I will update and go. I am still planning on making the give away winner her squirrel. If you still read this, please know that I think of it often.

ok....updates.
1. E was sick with stomach flu this weekend. He HATES throwing up. Even while he is doing it he says how yucky it it (yes, talks while the puke is coming out). I hate throwing up too, but I was impressed that he was able to talk while doing it. He said later that he wished it didn't have to come out of his mouth.
2. His 3yr old healthy boy visit found him 3 ft 1.5 inches tall and 31 pounds.
3. We live in a sketchy neighborhood and the other day I drove through a fight and someone tried to get into my car. I didn't mean to drive through a fight, it was just there.
4. As a result we are moving....though we were moving before that too...this just makes it even more important.
5. We just found out that E is pretty far down on every waiting list for every school we applied for him to go to...thanks Chicago Public Schools. We really needed more stress. We'll just send him to the neighborhood school where the fight was that I drove through.
6. I need to breathe and stop thinking the worst.
7. I'm tired of being run by our debt.
8. I've still only lost 20 lbs at wait w..atch.ers. I think I am going to juggle the money and just follow the program but use the money spent there to join the Gym here at school instead.
9. in the more than year since I have written: I had emergency surgery for a hernia, J's mom had a stroke, then J's mom had open heart surgery to repair a hole in her heart, my brother went to and came back safely from a non military mission in Afghanistan, e learned how to use the potty and now only wears a diaper at night, we moved and will move again, I took a new job at the university.
10. I have missed blogging but can't promise I'll keep up.

Have a good day...I'm going to try to do the same.

Hernia, furloughs, birthday countdown, and where the hack i've been

could they BE any sweeter?

Ok. So I've been away forever. Literally. Well, literally, a month. it feels like forever though. I've been away trying to work more efficiently at my job. That means no blogging at work. Would I actually ever have blogged at work? guilty. yes.

Because i work for a state university that is struggling through a financial crisis right now, I decided my job wasn't so much of a sure thing anymore. Why do I think this? well, it's a combination of them telling us so AND the furlough. We are all being furloughed 4 to 10 days. Thus the never blogging. That coupled with the fact that I've been doing more hours for the dog training and also coupled with the fact that my little baby is quickly approaching his 2nd birthday (which means a lot, but it means he's taking off in all kinds of directions). Link with that the fact tat J has been sick a bunch, her job ended so I'm working more hours and we're trying to sell stuff to make up or a 2 source income loss (furloughs and a lay off).

Then on Thursday of last week, something more happened. I woke up with a bad stomach ache. I felt bloated and sore al at once. Looked at my stomach and low and behold, I had a lump protruding from underneath my belly button. What the? I suffered through it Thursday. made an appointment with a new Dr. for the beginning of march and carried on. In discomfort. I also had a cold. I was coughing a lot. Every cough hurt. Went home. told J. She was like, well, maybe you should see a Dr. before that. I thought, eh, maybe. Friday. more pain. larger lump. Ok. So I went to the er to find that my suspicions were correct. I had an umbilical hernia. My brother had one too, last year, so I guess it must be genetic. They tried to push it back in. OUCH. When they couldnt, they decided to admit me and correct it surgically. Great.

What does this mean? Well, it means a lot o things. I'm on sick leave for the week. I am recovering from minor abdominal surgery. I get lots of rest, lots of olympics. I have a more normal looking belly button than I've had in years (see, it was looking funny for a while. it just started with the hard lump on Thursday).

Oh, and I can;t pick up anything heavier than a gallon milk carton for 6 weeks. E. is about 30 pounds. Which means J is on duty 24 7 and i can only talk to him. and kiss him. it's very hard. He's a very physical kid, and I find myself really missing him.

His birthday is Sat. and we have J's parents coming from MN. My mom and fam (who have been great through all this hernia business) will come too. But that's it. Small party. I can't believe he's going to be 2. He talks like crazy now (4 to 6 word sentences) and uses the potty a little. He knows when he has to poop, but has a hard time with pee. Sometimes he makes it to the potty, sometimes not. But every time is a win. And we're not in a huge hurry at all. We have switched to disposable diapers till I'm better. I'm the diapers washer, and J doesn't need that to add to her duties. The laundry is in the basement. Sorry environment.

Well this post is everywhere. For real, I hope that the promised squirrel will be done this week. I've been pretty remiss, but also, pretty overwhelmed for as long as I can think Sorry Leslie. I hope you still feel like a winner and are still reading.

Some recent cute pics!

table surfing. kid loves to climb

cousins

hard day

today was so hard it felt like a monday. to top it off, it rained all night making my poorly designed bus commute home quite soggy, and annoying. without going into detail, I'll just say that sometimes things come up at work that are difficult to address and they become a headache for me. What I dislike --oh come on, Sarah-- what I hate the most is when an emergency comes up at 4 and i have to fix it before i go. many of you who read this might be thinking i have a poor work ethic. I might. I might. But that's only because I want to be home with my fam. But at any rate, I did stay at work late and then I had my usual hour plus commute. got to see the peanut for about 40 minutes before bedtime.

I really have to get cracking with my crafting. I have lots to make.

still no poptarts

The Give Away

Well, one more long day down the hatch. Mondays are the days I teach dog class after working at the office. i love it, but it makes for a long day. We have an extra dog with us for the week too. He's a cute guy, but more on edge, and barks at the drop of a hat.

I have a lot of folding to do, but I want to remind you to make sure you sign up for the giveaway if you want to win an awesome thing. click here

I'm not sure blogging every day counts when what you blog says so little.

So We have a pretty simple life, and we always try to make e's room fun. Here are some pics from one corner of his room.

piano we found in the trash and a sweet chair and xylophone

hiding house from a box we found in the trash. e likes to hide in it

snakes, from e's birthday. Ssssss. they hang out in the house

ssssnake party favors. recycled knit kids clothing.

Give it away give it away give it away now

Ok. For all my readers, yes, even you, I am offering a super fun for me and you (yes, you) giveaway. Not familiar with the concept giveaway on a blog? It's simple, I offer something, and you all, all my readers, you all comment, post about the give away on your own blogs, sign up to follow me, that kind of stuff (full details below) and on a given date (in this case, December 1st) a winner will be announced. Winner will be picked randomly.

Now, why is my (MY) giveaway special? Well, I'm giving you the chance to tell ME what YOU want. That's right. But wait...it's not, "i want an eye-phone." the giveaway will be a dance peanut softie and this gives you chance to think up a softie you want to see, and have me take a swing at creating it.

Winners will be selected randomly. You have to enter to win.

several ways to enter.

• need some ideas? ask your kids, tell me your dream monster, think of a ridiculous combination (cat-horse or, um, elephant-fish --you know a fishaphant)

• what the hecks a softie?

• where's peanut? you're sweet to ask. asleep right now, but here he was in a leaf pile.

How to enter the "Dance Peanut Softie Adventure Giveaway":

1. Comment on this post and leave a detailed suggestion for a softie, for ex.: "wow sarah! I'm so excited about this giveaway that I wet my pants. Please make a rhino, a pink one."

a comment will give you one entry

2. if you Follow me that will give you 1 MORE entry. (but only if you comment. I wont know what to make you, otherwise.

3. Post about this Dance Peanut Softie Adventure Giveaway on your blog and that will get you 2 more entries.

So you could have a potential of 4 entries!!! right now, based on current comment trends, that would really make you have an unfair advantage, dear reader. But i won't tell if you won't tell.

full disclosure: since i started posting every day, I have felt a need to receive more comments than i generally do (oh, seeker of approval). I'm hoping this giveaway will bring quiet readers out of the woodwork and will also draw more readers to my blog.

And for those of you wondering, still no pop tarts. Today was hard but my resolve was strong.

making a statement on a very good day

I think that blog title says more than I think it will prove to be. In other words, not sure i can live up to it.

First off, I had a great day. I saw two (one at lunch and one in the evening) disabled performers. I work for a disability organization that looks at disability not as a problem with the person but as a problem with society. It's a perspective that I find really meaningful (i work there, afterall) and empowering for people with disabilities. Think about it, when society treats you like you have a problem (lets say, maybe you can't walk) that could be cured if you consulted the right drs, or if not cured, then managed to the point that you'd be all aok to be around people who don't have the problem, just as long as you don't cause any problems or fuss around too much. And also, it would be nice if you would work and not just live off of society, but too bad you can;t since you can't drive. I guess the key point in there is, a medical approach to disability is to cure it or manage it. A social approach looks at society, and the environment and says, well, wouldn't it make people with disabilities more independent if there were elevators at the train so they could take the train to work, and stuff like that. Anyway, I think I'm rambling. The point is, I saw 2 performers today, David Roche and Terry Galloway. They were amazing.

so there is that.....but

I'm also feeling pretty upset because j is in a moms group, a rather big one and they have a message board, and there was recently and outpouring of admiration and appreciation for an author who is anti gay, anti gay marriage and anti gay adoption. There was discussion about how "sux she's that way but love her marriage advice" and J was like, um, maybe not, and maybe there is something more to explore here. And some members her uncool about that and made my poor J feel bad. And I'm mad about it too. i mean really? what would they say if the author was a racist?

I also don't like anyone to feel sad, especially not my girl, so i feel extra upset about it.

day 2, no pop tarts.

blogging AND crafting

Yes, that's right. I am making a stuffed elephant (wee wonderfuls) and blogging at once.

while I was cutting it out, my least favorite part, I made up a little rhyme about it.

josie my cat standing on the cut pieces

E's friend P turned 3

so I am making it for she

soon you will see

this elephant by wee.

sewn by me

here they are, complete pictures. Cell phone quality, but you get the picture:

and day one without pop tarts went off without a hitch...which is to say, I didn't eat any.

giving up

pop tarts

they are my current weakness. I struggle with my weight a bit and hearing your ideas, along with some not so deep searching, its an easy first step...eliminate the pop tarts. I remember when this habit began..they stare at me through the glass, taunting, no, inviting me with their "good source of vitamins and minerals" claim. they are also a good source of too many calories and sugar.

How many calories? How much sugar?

Nutrition Facts
Serving Size: 1 pastry

Amount per Serving
Calories 200 Calories from Fat 45
% Daily Value *
Total Fat 5g	8%
Saturated Fat 2g	10%
Cholesterol 0mg	0%
Sodium 210mg	9%
Total Carbohydrate 36g	12%
Dietary Fiber 1g	4%
Sugars 19g
Protein 3g	6%

Vitamin A	10%
Vitamin C	0%
Calcium	0%
Iron	10%
Thiamin (B1)	10%
Riboflavin (B2)	10%
Niacin (B3)	10%
Vitamin B6	10%
Folic Acid (Folate)	10%

---

Est. Percent of Calories from:

Fat 22.5% Carbs 72.0%

Protein 6.0%

yeah, and in case you're wondering, I ate 2 at a time. 2.

That's done.

over.

Sorry for the boring post.

I just wanted to declare tomorrow the start of no more pop tarts. Stay tuned for updates of my success and struggles!!

trying for 30

Now, it's no secret that I don't post as often as some people do. Part of that stems from the fact that i am busy, part of it comes from being lazy, and then I also think no one reads anyway, but that's not the point, I guess. So even though it's november 3rd and I am going to need to play catch up, I am doing the NaBloPoMo challenge. It will give me a chance to articulate all the crazy stuff that's been happening of late.

And hopefully make me a better blogger.

I am going to take this moment to say that while I mostly write about peanut, I'm going to try to write about other things too, like crafting and maybe even politics, Or to bore the life out of you, my life story.

I'm also trying to lose weight, could write about that as well.

remember

A week ago, J and I celebrated our 10 year anniversary. We had a rare dinner out to celebrate. We brought the peanut because it feels right to, but also because babysitters are kind of hard to come by. and expensive. and well, again we miss peanut.

J started a paying baby-sitting gig which is awesome. It's just the miracle we needed to get the bills paid and not feel like we are drowning in bills. I feel so relaxed about it now. Chicago is expensive, but it's where we are now, and I like it here, but I also do think that it would be easier to do this if we lived somewhere cheaper. I have 3 jobs here though, and one of them, 2 of them actually, is pretty hard to come by. I am a service dog trainer. and that's not an easy job to get. I also hold a job in a university, and most unis have a firing freeze right now due to the economic crisis. a few months ago, or maybe even a year ago now (where does the time go?) we were considering moving to MN. Then the crisis broke and there was no hope for a job. I'm glad we didn't move. J and p have all kinds of friends and i have my dream job working with service dogs.

In baby news, little 18 month old had a rough night last night. J is trying to nurse him less at night, but sometimes he gets up and wants to nurse right away. Since he sleeps with us, and is very insistent, there is no sleeping when he wants to nurse and the answer is no. So last night, so J could sleep, I packed him up and we slept on the couch with some water. He resists transitional objects, so i brought his small red furry monster, but he wanted nothing to do with him. "No" he said. But he cried every time I tried to take away the sippy. So I ditched it after he fell asleep. For those of you reading and worrying about P's safety on a couch, please don't. He was safe, and had plenty of room, and we have done this before. He slept from 2 till 643. That's how long I slept too. Initially, he had slept from 9:30 till 1:30. Sleep is hard again. That's what I get for thinking it was easier.

I have an extra dog this weekend. A service dog I'm re-training. P loves dogs and couldn't be happier. Winnie, our dog, is also pretty happy.



Well, for a busy mom, I've certainly said more than I thought I would today.

One last thing, I clearly remember what 9/11 2001 was like, and I wish I could hug everyone who is saddened by the disaster. I guess I will just have to remember them and hope that helps a little somehow. I hope peanut never has to experience a day like that.
yesterday at the park, his friend showed up in the exact outfit pretty much. P is trying on his friends helmet.

Have a great weekend y'all and if you're reading, shout me out a hi, even if you usually lurk. I'm wondering who reads and I have no way of knowing unless you comment.

Where have I been?

It's been so long since I've posted. Peanut has gone from sitting to scooting backwards and now, almost crawling. It's kind of awe-inspiring how much he learns and how much he changes every day. As i've mentioned, I am the working mom. We spend our time together in the mornings so J can sleep, and so she can ready herself for the day (by getting enough sleep). And then I'm off to work for the day, missing them both, wishing I could be there to see him. We live in Chicago, and my commute is about an hour, no matter how I slice it. It can be less, but it rarely is. Some times J packs peanut in the car and they come get me from work which is awesome.

Right now, J is at a knitting night with the moms she is friends with and I'm at home with peanut, who is asleep. His new bedtime is 7:30. That's the nice thing about daylight savings time. What isn't as nice is the morning at 5:30. But it helps me get to work more on time.

W

Where else have I been?

Apple Orchard

Visit with J's Nephews,

Peanut's first Halloween.

Election 08

Amazed at my crawling, standing, hugging clapping really cute baby.

Sad that he's growing so fast.

Dog training

being a mom.

oh, and crafting.